Wrong With Me

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by Madrox, Oct 30, 2012.

  1. Madrox

    Madrox Guest

    Wrong With Me


    Rating: 15+ For strong language and mild violence.

    Characters: MCR, Avenged Sevenfold, Panic! At The Disco (old), Twiztid, and myself. (And possibly some random guests)

    Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to any of said bands or band members. This story is completely fictional and has no relation to their lives whatsoever.. Nor do I own the song stated in the title, which is by Twiztid.

    Plot/Summary: A girl finds out that she has a mental disorder that she never wanted to even think about. Go through her crazy life and see what it's like to have said disorder and all of her crazy friends that help her stay happy and positive. (Plot tends to change)

    Genre: Horror/ Romance/ Comedy/ Drama




    Chapter Index:
    1. Afraid Of Me - Page One

    2. Hold on to me- Page One




    Afraid Of Me


    Laken's Point of View

    "Aghh, what time is it, baby?" I asked Zacky Vengeance as I woke out of my slumber.

    "It's two in the morning.. Go back to sleep, honey." He muttered, rolling over and getting comfortable once again so he could fall back to sleep.

    I just sat there, wondering why it was that every single night, I woke at the most random hour. I couldn't get myself to fall back asleep, so I got up and walked into the bathroom. I looked at myself closely in the mirror, seeing that my face was pale, looking as if I were dead.

    I closed my eyes slowly, and started to hear the voices and see those people again. I opened my eyes quickly and shook my head violently. I needed to clear my head. I couldn't possibly be hearing them again, could I?

    I looked over at my sleeping angel and smiled wryly at him, wondering what he would think if he knew I was up, hearing voices. He would just think I was crazy. He probably wouldn't even believe me, just like everyone else.

    Four hours passed of me pacing the room, wondering if I should tell him or not. Thinking to myself if I should seek help for these reoccurring issues. Maybe, maybe not. I looked over at him again to see him waking up slowly.


    "How long have you been pacing, sweetie?" He groaned, rubbing his eyes, slowly getting out of bed.

    "I don't even know.. Since I woke you up last.." I mumbled, trying to hide the fact that I can't sleep properly anymore. Just another sign of going crazy..

    "Baby, you can't keep staying up all night.. I'm starting to get worried about you." He frowned as he walked up to me, grabbed me by the waist and kissed my cheek sweetly.

    I just stood there and bit at my snakebites. What was I going to do? Tell him that I think I'm schizophrenic? No, I have to find out before I make accusations. Whatever, I'm just going to tell him. I wriggled my nose ever so slightly, moving my septum piercing in the process.

    I turned around and kissed him on the lips. "Hey, love.. I'm going to the doctor today to see about my sleeping issues. I have an appointment in about an hour." I looked at the alarm clock and back at Zacky, smiling softly.

    As soon as I started to walk off, the doorbell rang. Who in the world could that be at six in the morning? I slowly walked to the door and peered through the glass. It was Frank again. How many times would he come see me in a week? This is getting ridiculous.

    I opened the door and exclaimed sarcastically, "What in the world do you want this early in the morning?" Zacky walked up behind me to see who was at the door.

    "I just wanted to see if you were awake. I'm bored. Ya know, it gets really lonely living alone in that house next to you when you never come out." Frank smiled with a slight pout in his words.

    "You say that everyday." I sighed, smiling a bit.

    "Maybe that's a sign.." He smiled ever so slightly.

    "No, maybe that's you being extremely obnoxious." Zacky smirked, only joking. We loved Frank.

    "Come on in, Frank. Help yourself to the fridge and the coffee. You can spend some time with Zacky. I have to go get ready for my appointment."

    --


    Zacky's Point of View.



    Something's up with Laken. She doesn't sleep much anymore and she won't eat a lot.. What could be wrong? Is she... nah. I'm coming to ridiculous conclusions. She's just stressed is all. I watched as she walked off to go get ready and turned back to Frank.

    "So, what-" I started to ask, but was cut off by him running to the coffee machine and pouring a class as if it were the last cup of coffee in the world.

    "What?" Frank smiled, sipping his coffee carefully.

    "Never mind," I said, chuckling to myself. What a site he was..

    I turned around to see a fully made over version of the woman I married.

    "Whoa.." I said, examining her up and down as Frank whistled. "Are you sure you're just going to the doctor's?"

    "Yeah, I just didn't want to look like the bum that I usually am," She said, smiling nervously. "Now come outside and smoke with me. I have something to discuss with you."

    We walked outside, sat on the porch swing and I lit her cigarette as well as my own. "What's up?" I said, putting my arm around her.

    "Well," She looked down at her shoes, taking a long drag off her cigarette, "I think I may be insane. You know.. I hear voices all the time and that's why I can't sleep half of the time.. I thought I would tell you now because I didn't want to hide it any longer." She blew out the smoke while speaking.

    I kissed her lightly on the cheek and smiled warmingly, "That's okay. You know I'm not going to judge you for anything, right? I love you the way you are. You could have no skin and I'd still love you. Nothing will ever change that. Please understand that. I didn't marry you because of your sanity or insanity. I married you because you are the love of my life and the only woman I want."

    She smiled up at me and kissed me on the lips passionately. I responded by deepening the kiss slightly and lovingly. "I love you.." She told me, still smiling.

    Frank walked out of our house with a mug of coffee in his hands, smiling. "I'll see you guys later, I'm going to go see what everyone else is up to. Maybe we could all hang out later or something," He waved behind him as he walked back to his house, pulling out his phone.

    "Well, I have to go. I'll be back soon, I promise," Laken said as she smiled and kissed me once again. "Be good."

    I just sat on the porch and thought about how we could create an interesting day for Laken with Ryan, Jon, Brendon, Spencer, Gerard, Mikey, Ray, Jamie, Paul, Brian, Matt, Jimmy, Johnny and Frank.
     
  2. crescendo.

    crescendo. il mio amore

    My personal opinion. It has a good plot idea but seems rushed. At the beginning of the chapter it's said that she doesn't want to worry him until she's sure, then she tells him. Just my thought.
    Other than that it looks good, except for the fact that I hate the fact that it's centered but that's just me being me.

    First post in this section in a LONG time, be happy
     
  3. Madrox

    Madrox Guest

    I was just thinking she thought about it good and well all night and decided to say something to him before she went. Maybe I should add that in.
     
  4. crescendo.

    crescendo. il mio amore

    It would help it make a lot more sense and seem less rushed
     
  5. Madrox

    Madrox Guest

    Hold on To Me


    Laken's Point of View

    I tossed my cigarette onto the ground and stepped on it, putting it out. Sighing, I walked to my car, pulling my keys out of my back pocket and unlocked the door. Slowly, I got into the Mazda and cranked it, letting it run for a while.

    It was now eight in the morning and I had just got done seeing the psychaitrist about my issues. She told me that it was most likely Skitzoprenia and something called 'Borderline Personality Disorder'. What did that mean?

    "f**k!" I yelled into the steering wheel, placing my forhead in the middle. Slamming my head into the wheel, I accidentally honked the horn over and over, getting odd stares from the people around me.

    I sighed once again and put my car into gear, backing out of the parking space. Slowly but surely, I began to drive home to tell Zacky the 'wonderful' news. On the way, I stopped by the pharmacy and dropped of my perscripton for Trazodone, the pill that is supposed to help me sleep.

    The entire ride home was silent, despite my frustration. I didn't know how to tell him. He did say he loved me anyways, correct? Well, I'll find out soon enough.

    I pulled into the driveway about fifteen minutes later slowly parked the car. About to cry, I sat in my car for another twenty or so minutes, trying to clear my head.

    Lazily, I got out of the car and slammed the door. "Oh poop.." I groaned as I forced myself up the steps to the front door.

    Before I could even reach for the door, Zacky opened it and smiled at me. I looked up at him with an expression of defeat.

    "What's wrong?" He asked me as he pulled me into a sentimental kiss. "You look exhasted."

    "I am.. emotionally," I put my head into his chest, "I got the worst news today and I just don't like it at all."

    "What exactly happened?"

    I sat on the porch swing and motioned for him to come sit beside me and I sighed. "They think that I'm Skitzoprenic and I have Borderline Personality Disorder. Oh, and they perscribed me medicine to sleep."

    "That's not bad news at all, baby. That just means you're one step closer to fixing the problem. You know?" He smiled warmly and put his arm around me, pulling me in.

    I couldn't help but to smile a little. "What's for breakfast?" I nudged him and got up from the swing.

    Later...

    "Which outfit do you like better on me?" I held two different outfits up and showed them off one by one.

    "That one," Zacky announced, pointing and smiling at the short studded black dress with combat boots.

    I pecked him on the lips and ran into the bathroom, getting ready for the party tonight.

    As soon as I stepped foot into the bathroom, the voices came again. I twitched a little and my eyes opened wide after hearing what they told me to do. "I can't do that!" I announced to them.

    "Is everything alright in there?" He called from the bedroom. "Who are you talking to?"

    "No one, honey. And yes, everything is fine." I studied myself in the mirror and walked back to the other room slowly, thinking about what just happened. "What the hell..." I muttered to myself.

    Once Zacky was walking out the door, I quickly grabbed something from the kitchen and put it into my purse. I ran out the door and caught up to him as if I didn't do anything at all.



    At The Party


    Zacky's Point Of View

    We were all having a wonderful time until the lights went out. We all heard an ear- piercing scream come from the middle of the room. What just happened?

    I carefully made sure I knew where Laken was. She was standing right next to me. How did I not notice that to begin with?

    The lights progressively turned back on and what we saw made us all gasp in horror.

    Spencer was laying in a pool of blood, dead.

     
  6. MrBoggins

    MrBoggins Jesus take the PRNDL!

    I agree with Kat. The centering is a little disheartening. It could turn potential readers off. :/ And please make sure your chapter index shows chapter numbers, at least in addition to the chapter names. Thanks!
     
  7. Madrox

    Madrox Guest

    Fixed.. :|
     
  8. kadoodle

    kadoodle crazy cat lady Staff Member

    Can you please change your font size? I'd really like to read your fic, but the tiny font makes my eyes cross.
     
  9. Madrox

    Madrox Guest

    Changed. Anything to please a reader. :)
     

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