Teach Me How To Love

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Archive' started by MCRxParader, Apr 26, 2008.

  1. MCRxParader

    MCRxParader Active Member

    CHAPTER 35


    My breath caught in my throat after his statement. I considered my next few words carefully, even though I knew I had no choice in the matter. I had given him my word that I would do whatever it took to win his trust back. If this is what he wanted, I couldn’t refuse, or it would be the end of whatever it was that we had.

    Instead of saying anything, I just nodded my head slowly.


    “Yeah. Yeah, of course. Whatever it is you want.”


    He smiled at me, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. That familiar distrust of everyone around him that I saw just a few weeks prior was back. I hated it; and I hated even more that I was the cause of it now.


    I laughed awkwardly in an attempt the break the silence that had formed after this odd decision we had just made.


    “So, uh, how do we go about planning a road trip to see your ex-boyfriend who fell off the face of the earth?


    His eyes widened. “Road trip? How far are we going?”


    “Canada.”


    Frank just sighed and scratched his head. “Yeah, that sounds about right.”


    I didn’t ask him what he meant. I don’t think I was ready to go at that moment.


    It suddenly dawned on me that this trip would either make or break me and Frank. I wasn’t entirely sure of his motives behind wanting to come, though I assumed they were along the same as mine – closure. But what did closure mean for Frank? How did I know he wouldn’t go running back into Nate’s arms the second they were reunited? I know he wasn’t mine, but the thought made my face go hot and my throat tight. But I pushed the thought to the back of my mind, for now. I had an entire day ahead of me.


    “Are we okay?”


    “Yeah, Gee, we’re fine. I’m still a little…upset. But it’s okay. I’m fine. We’re fine.”


    I wasn’t convinced. I would find a way to make it up to him in a big way later. But I didn’t have time to think about it too much, as the bell had rung, signaling the start of the day.


    I gave Frank a quick, apologetic glance. “I’ll see you at lunch?”


    He looked at me with those giant hazel eyes of him and I felt my stomach flip for what felt like the 800th time that day. There was still a look of disappointment in them, but I saw what seemed to be a flash of something more tender.


    “Yeah, Gee. I’ll save you a seat.” He chuckled softly.


    The rest of the day went by in a blur. I wasn’t much able to focus on my teaching, but I had been doing this for a while now, so my body was basically on autopilot anyway. Lunch with Frank went just fine, and I felt him slowly loosen up around me again. It wasn’t where we were at before, but I knew I couldn’t win his trust back that easily.


    I dropped Frank off at home, waving him goodbye, my chest aching with longing at the fact that I would have to wait until tomorrow morning to see him again. I breathed deeply, and the aching subsided ever so slightly.


    As much as I missed Frank already, it was a relief to pull into my driveway knowing I had a night of watching stupid movies ahead of me until I had to go to sleep. I trudged up the stairs, already loosening my tie so I could change into comfortable clothes the second I got through the door. I noticed Mikey’s car parked next to the sidewalk. Perfect, now maybe we could finally have a f**king conversation.


    God, I wished some higher being – if one even existed – would have prepared me for what I saw in front of me when I walked in. Movement on the couch, a soft groan, a blanket shuffling. I forgot I had been holding my briefcase until the thing crashed to the floor, startling me out of my shock.


    Mikey. And Ms. Sporkel. On the couch. Their clothes on the floor. I didn’t stay long enough to confirm what my mind had already subconsciously figured out. Scrambling for the stuff that was inside my briefcase and running out the door, I could have sworn that I saw a nasty smirk on Mikey’s face as I fled.


    I slammed the driver’s seat door, gripping the steering wheel with one shaking hand and dialing Frank’s phone number on my cell phone with the other. He picked up after 3 rings, thank f**king goodness.


    I heard his good-natured smirk through his words. “Couldn’t stay away for more than twenty minutes, huh?”


    I didn’t answer. Just breathed raggedly into the receiver.


    Now I heard concern in Frank’s voice. “Gerard, is everything okay?”


    “Far from it. I got into my house…Mikey…and Iris…on the couch…no clothes...f**king hell.”


    Frank gasped audibly. I don't think he even knew what to say.


    “Do you mind if I come over there? Please? I can’t even imagine going back in there.”


    “Of course, Gee, of course. I’ll be waiting for you.”
     
    WeAreTBP likes this.
  2. WeAreTBP

    WeAreTBP Active Member

    Ugh Mikey is the WORST
     
  3. MCRxParader

    MCRxParader Active Member

    CHAPTER 36

    I sped over to Frank’s house as fast as I safely could, all the while swallowing the anxious lump in my throat that had begun to form.

    What the f**k was going on? How could Mikey do this to me? Why was he doing this to me? I tried to wrap my head around it but kept coming up more and more confused with my brother.
    I pulled into Frank’s driveway after what seemed like 5 hours of driving. For a minute I just stared blankly at my steering wheels, hands gripping it so hard that my knuckles started to ache. My jaw was clenched as tightly as a fist.

    Forcing myself to take a deep, shaky breath in and then out, I exited my car and started walking up to Frank’s door. Before I had the chance to knock, it swung open and Frank was staring at me, a look of worry in his hazel eyes. Tentatively, he wrapped his arms around me, his small frame pressed up against me. He didn’t say anything, which I was grateful for in that moment.

    He led me inside, and I saw that he had fixed up the couch for me with an incredibly soft-looking pillow and blanket. For a moment, I still kept staring, not able to think or say anything. Then, everything that has happened over the last couple of months, and I mean absolutely f**king everything hit me at once.

    I felt my legs buckle below me, my knees hitting in the ground as I whimpered, then began full-on sobbing. I knelt, my face buried in my hands, and let the guttural scream rip through me. Everything – falling in love with a man whose feelings I was still in the dark about, finding out about this past, my brother betraying me – the weight of it all sent me crashing to the ground, knocking the wind out of me.

    I don’t know how long I stayed there, knees on the ground, torso on the floor, face buried in my hands. Second? Minutes? Hours? I couldn’t escape the mental images of Frank and Nate looking utterly in love, or Mikey and Iris f**king on my couch. It felt like I was outside of my own body, watching myself utterly break down on Frank’s living room floor. I had lost my brother, and the trust of the person that I loved the most in this world. It was too much.

    And then, I felt his finger under my chin. I felt him slowly lift my face up to meet his. Our eyes locked and then, all I could see was his eyes – he didn’t take them off me for a second. The last thing I felt was being wrapped up in his arms – but not like before. No, this felt as if he were trying to absorb my pain, make it his own. His arms, so strong, held onto me as if I would fall off the face of the earth if he let me go. I buried my face into Frank’s warm shoulder and just sobbed there. He didn’t say anything…he just let me.

    Although it wasn’t incredibly late in the day, I was mentally and emotionally exhausted. Frank led me over to the couch and swept the blanket over me. My head fell straight onto the pillow, welcoming the soft surface against my burning cheeks. I must have fallen asleep minutes later, even though I barely remember drifting off. God, I must have been so tired. I was so f**king tired of thinking and feeling things that I didn’t want to feel.
    In what must have been the middle of the night, I woke up. The house was dark and quiet. I heard the soft patter of rain on the living room window.

    And then I felt Frank crawl onto the couch beside me. He lifted the blanket and got underneath it. Again, those small yet strong arms wrapped around me. I pretended to be asleep.

    He kissed the back of my head. I felt him tuck a stray piece of hair behind my ear, and then he kissed the back of my neck so tenderly.

    “I’m here, Gee,” he whispered, as if he thought I couldn’t hear him. “I’m here, and I’m not leaving.”
     
  4. Miz Erie

    Miz Erie Black Mariah Staff Member

    So I haven't actually read this, but I'm very curious after glancing over this new chapter. I hope you'll continue to post updates. If and when you finish it, let me know, and I'll move it to the completed section and read it. (I don't read incomplete fics because so many are abandoned now.)
     
    Ali Love likes this.

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