I had become very angry with them over the course of their break. I thought that they had ruined my life, because I had spent 6 years of it devoted to them, with hardly any friends, and this obsession that was taking over. And now I realized that it's true. They did ruin my life. In the best possible way. Because if I had never found them, I would have had a life. I would have had a lot of friends, and went to a lot of parties, and probably had a whole lot of fun. But I never would have found myself. I wouldn't have been myself. MCR gave me the courage to do that.