Don't let them bring you down

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by adrenaline 2019, Jul 3, 2011.

  1. adrenaline 2019

    adrenaline 2019 New Member

    Title
    Don't let them bring you down
    Rating
    15+ (kissing, language, sex scenes, abuse)
    Main characters
    Gerard, Mikey, Frankie, Ray, Sammy, Sian, Amy, Sharna, Isabelle, Jimmy & more to come
    Summery
    (I am not very good with these things but here goes a try)
    Gerard, Sammy, Natalie, Lucy, Mikey, Frankie and Jimmy are a not very popular lot they get beaten up by the cheerleaders boyfriends, and they get the piss taken out of them by the cheerleaders, but things could become allot different
    Genre
    romance :hearts: and abit of drama :shock:
    Chapter index
    chapter 1 page 1 Gerard and Jimmy's POV
    chapter 2 page 1| Lucy, Gerard's POV
    chapter 3 page 2| Alicia, Natalie and Mikey's POV
    chapter 4 page 2|Natalie and Mikey's POV
    chapter 5 page 2|Lucy's POV
    chapter 6 page 3|Lucy and Natalie's POV
    chapter 7 page 3|Lucy and Natalie's POV
    chapter 8 page 3|Lewis, Brendan, Gerard, Mikey and Mr Urie's POV
    chapter 9 page 3| Mikey and Lucy's(x2) POV
    chapter 10 page 4| Natalie, Lucy, Mikey and Gerard's POV
    chapter 11 page 4| Mikey, Brendan and gerard's POV (part 1)
    chapter 11 page 6|Lucy, Gerard and Mikey's POV (part 2)
    chapter 12 page 6|Gerard and Natalie's POV
    chapter 13 page 7|Natalie's POV
    chapter 14 page 7|Natalie, Lucy Echo and Gerard's POV
    chapter 15 page 8|Natalie, Lucy and Gerard's POV
    authors note: I hope you will all read if you want something changed please say and also if it isn't very good please say but not to harsh I will try and sort these things out :w00t: update today
     
  2. adrenaline 2019

    adrenaline 2019 New Member

    chapter 1
    Gerard's POV

    "Time for school" my mum shouted up to me

    "Mum I could care f**king less for school, but I want to go to see my friends" I told my mum half way down the stairs, as I got down we started to talk about school

    "Before Mikey comes down I want to just say something about him, well I think that he has got a crush on a girl, a friend of ours" I told my mum

    "I will ask him" my mum told me

    "hey what you talking about" Mikey asked before bashing into the wall because he was staring at his phone

    "what you looking at?" I asked before snatching the phone of him

    "WHY THE f**k ARE YOU STARING AT NATALIE FOR, OO YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON NATALIE ASK HER OUT TODAY" I yelled at my baby bro

    at school

    "go on then ask her out" I encouraged my brother

    "HEY GUYS!" Mikey yelled over to the gang

    "oh look who it is the emo dick heads" Sian f**ked out

    "f**k off you witch" I told her before we walked over to are gang and that is when Mikey asked the very important question

    "hey Natalie, I was thinking about you allot, and well I was wondering if you would go out with....me" Mikey asked before there was a giant silence

    (sorry it so short I will update tomorrow enjoy)

    chapter 2
    Lucy's POV

    "FOR f**kS SAKE NATALIE ANSWER HIM!!" I yelled at her, as she looked at me with shock and confusion in her eyes,

    "but I don't kn..." Natalie mumbled

    "P.I.N.K.H.A.I.R DYE" I teased

    "okay okay well yes I think in fact yeah sure I will" Natalie replied

    "YEY YEY YEY YEY, I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND HURRAY HURRAY YIPPY YIPPY I AM SO HAPPY I AM THE MOST HAPPIEST GUY EVER!!!" Mikey yelled out whilst having a spaz attack

    "oh my freaking god what are on Mikey drugs" Gerard asked

    "actually no I am not on drugs I a just going out with Natalie so ha I win game and YOU LOOSE!" Mikey explain in a sarcastic tone.

    "I must get myself a girlfriend" Gerard whispered to himself, i gotta admit he is sort of hot but I would never be his girlfriend anyway.

    "stop fantasizing about things that won't happen" I slapped my head and headed of for first period.

    after first period I was being quite mean to Gee, but it was fun

    "Gee?"

    "what?" Gee asked whilst staring into my eyes

    "GERARD-GIRLFRIEND-LESS!" I yelled at him, before he ran off in complete tears

    "WAY..TO..GO!" the cheerios yelled at us

    "that isn't f**king funny and Lucy that was to hard, come on mikes lets go find him" Natalie told me and the cheerios making me feel like a wh**e

    Gerard's POV

    "Gee where are you?" Natalie asked

    "I'm round here" I told them, before Mikey walked off, in allot of confusion

    "come on Gee Lucy never meant that you should no that well it was just meant to be me and Mikes but do you want to come to my house tonight?" Natalie asked but I couldn't answer as the cheerleader Alicia came over and butted in

    "oh look who's a cheating mother f**ker, cheater, cheater, how will Mikey feel when I tell him that you have invited his brother round, just so that you can f**k each other" Alicia being Alicia

    "right that's it" Natalie told Alicia before knocking her over and beating the living shut out of her.

    "miss Urie come with me now" the history teacher asked her, as soon as Natalie got taken away, I ran over to the others, but just as I got to them Alicia's boyfriend came went over to Natalie then they got into a fight so the principle had to come out to break them up,

    "COME ON THEN YOU FAT BASTARD GIVE ME ALL YOU HAVE GOT!" Natalie yelled

    "YOUR A wh**e A f**kING wh**e!" kyle yelled
    before they started to get physical

    "f**k that just got worse and Lucy will you go out with me?" I asked

    "f**k YEAH!" Lucy yelled, just as Lucy loosened her grip

    Mikey being Mikey ran over to Natalie and that git, Natalie was practically unconscious but she was able to walk to the office as she got in there was a couple of cops waiting there for them to enter.

    "what do you f**king cops want" Natalie asked the cops with attitude

    "Miss Natalie Urie we are arresting you under suspicion of drug dealing, alcohol use and fighting" the cops told her but I heard everything and went over to the others

    "guys I got Mikey back and Natalie is getting arrested for apparent drug dealing, alcohol use and fighting" is all I managed to say before there was a silence in the whole school :scared:

    hope it is long enough
     
  3. [*sammy*]

    [*sammy*] Guest

    Nat, no offence, but this thread isn't the best. It doesn't make sense, and your spelling is pretty bad. May I suggest you get automatic spell check on your computer? It underlines the spelling mistake and gives you different ways on how to spell the word. I think your biting off more than you can chew. You should stick to one thread at a time. Your other one is really good, so maybe just stick to that. Sorry it's so formal. I'm just in a formal mood today.

    :nono:
     
  4. Lenore

    Lenore Inked and Sexy Staff Member

    Hey love!
    Maybe you should re-evaluate your rating; it says it's for 12+, but your story still contains sex scenes. Take a look at the FF Ratings, maybe it'll help. It could also be good idea to do a spell check before posting your story, and maybe find a Beta Reader. Good luck!
     
  5. Static scream

    Static scream Member

    nat i comand u to update
     
  6. adrenaline 2019

    adrenaline 2019 New Member

    okay I will look through my story and okay
     
  7. adrenaline 2019

    adrenaline 2019 New Member

    I will stat to update and write this story now seeing as I am finished with my other one so when I do write this I hope you enjoy it as much as you enjoyed
    :I will always love you know matter what:
     
  8. Static scream

    Static scream Member

    more soon i can help u if you want i will write it and i shall show you the chapter on fb or something
     
  9. adrenaline 2019

    adrenaline 2019 New Member

    kkkkkkkkkkkk
     
  10. [*sammy*]

    [*sammy*] Guest

    Good! It's better than the last one (update). I like the story, and if you update soon... I'll update my fic
     
  11. adrenaline 2019

    adrenaline 2019 New Member

    There should he a long update today :blink:
     
  12. adrenaline 2019

    adrenaline 2019 New Member

    chapter 3
    Alicia's POV

    "ATTENTION STUDENTS I WILL HAVE TO ASK YOU IF YOU CAN ALL MAKE YOUR WAY TO THE HALL, THANK YOU" the principle

    "I wonder what will happen with Natalie?" Gerard asked

    in the hall

    "hahaha your in hand cuffs and you will have to say sorry to the whole entire high school for setting a bad reputation then the cops will say that arresting you bit" I boasted

    "okay then students and staff I have called you hear because Miss Urie has something to say" the principle announced

    "I'm sorry for setting a bad reputation for the school, but I have gotten arrested, I will repay you all" Natalie spoke out almost in tears, just as the student body was about to start to talk and get loud the cops did their bit

    "now before I let the cops say anything the things that Miss Urie is getting arrested for are very disturbing"

    "Miss Natalie C Urie I am arresting you under suspicion of drug dealing, alcohol use and fighting" just as the cops finished saying that the emo f**kers ran out of there like a the just got raped

    "GUYS!" Natalie yelled before making the cops let go off her and running after her friends

    "okay guys I am hand cuffed just let me speak to them" Natalie asked with the cops permission she went to talk to her friends

    Natalie's POV

    "guys why did you run out?" I asked with my hands behind my back

    "why did we run out, well maybe it is because my 16 year old sister is going to f**king jail, for alcohol use, drug dealing and fighting, does that answer why we ran out" Lucy told me

    "your mad, I never did this stuff, well the fighting yes but the rest I never did that, Mikey are you mad at me?" I asked my eyes starting to water

    "WHY THE f**k DID YOU BECOME A DRUGGY AND AN ALCOHOLIC WE ARE OVER I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN YOU SICK wh**e!!" Mikey yelled at me

    a year later the release of Natalie

    "hey guys" I entered the room looking out numbered

    "where's Gee and Mikes?" I asked in curiosity

    "oh after you got arrested they never showed I don't know if they will come out again" Lucy explained

    "come on then we can go and see them" I told Lucy, Sammy and the others

    at Gerard and Mikey's house

    Mikey's POV

    "Mikey you were a f**king son of a witch with Natalie last year, you either get back with her or I will take away your unicorns" Gerard told me

    "FINE FINE JUST DON'T TAKE AWAY MY UNICORNS!" I told Gee

    "ha" Gee laughed

    "I do still love her in fact I never stopped, and I should of been the one going into jail not her..." I told Gee not realising that the girls, Jimmy and Brendan where standing at the lounge door

    "what do you mean?" Gee asked in ALLOT of suspicion

    "I mean I am to blame I was the one giving Natalie the drugs and the alcohol" I explained before everything went absolutely silent

    sorry but you will have to wait and see for what happens next

    chapter 4

    "YOU WHAT, SO YOU MADE NATALIE GO THROUGH A YEAR OF f**kING HELL!" Jimmy yelled

    “Right you have two choices hear you can both stand there and yell at me all day or you can shut the f**k up and then I can tell you the story of what happened” Mikey answered looking shocked

    “Fine tell us the story” Sammy replied

    “well around a year and a half ago me and Natalie went to the park for the day, I showed her drugs, alcohol and then I told her that she wasn’t allowed them, but Natalie being Natalie she was acting all cute and told me to give them her, I still told her she wasn’t allowed but do you know what she went and did, she took them off me, I was eventually okay with her taking the drugs and alcohol because me and my dad used to do that, there are you happy now” mikey explained

    “Okay so it is 50% your fault and 50% Natalie’s fault that works” Sammy sarcastically replied

    “Mikey can I talk to you for a second?” Gerard asked

    “Yeah sure but not hear”

    Mikey’s POV

    “What?” I asked

    “You are going to get back with Natalie or I go up into your room and take your unicorns then I will hide them in my basement, and then I will lock them up and not tell you where I put them” Gerard threatened

    “Okay then, ermm Natalie, I know that I told you we were through but I never meant any of that because it was all my fault, I never meant for it to become like this so I was wondering if you would get back with me?” I asked whilst covering my head

    “Yeah of cause I will, but I need to ask you a very important question, ALONE” Natalie replied as if she was in a f**ked up world, as she finished saying that the other guys half left

    “Okay then have you got any more?” Natalie asked confusing me

    “Any more of what?” I asked reluctantly

    “I mean have you got any more of the drugs and alcohol?” Natalie asked really serious

    “No I burned them all because they were giving my life hell and they got you addicted and you are only 16, and I really love you and I don’t want to lose you” is all I told her before she grabbed me and pulled me onto the sofa and kissing me gently

    “no, no, no, no, no and let me think NO YOUR ARE NOT DOING THAT YOU ARE f**kING 16” Brendan Yelled at us
    “WHAT THE f**k DID YOU THINK WE WERE DOING?” Natalie asked Brendan in anger

    “Right that’s it you’re not allowed to see mikey again” Brendan told me

    “You’re not my dad” Natalie told Brendan in an annoying tone

    “Fine”

    Ring, Ring
    Dad: hello
    Brendan: Hi dad
    Dad: what is it now?
    Brendan: Natalie was f**king Mikey
    Dad: right Natalie you are not allowed to see mikey again we had this talk before and agreed if you did it again you would never see mikey again, and you are grounded

    “f**k YOU BRENDAN f**k ALL OF YOU I NEVER WANT TO SEE ANY OF YOU AGAIN!” Natalie yelled before she ran out of there like a cheetah

    “Thank you Brendan you have gotten her made at all of us thanks a bunch” everyone spoke at the same time in an awkward way before they all walked out

    Natalie’s POV

    I think that my life has turned out to be hell so I think that I will move to live with my Nan for a while

    “Hey guys I have found a letter it is from Natalie, it says” Sammy informed everyone

    Dear guys
    I have decided to move away and live with my Nan for a while because I am obviously not wanted here so I will leave all of you alone, I can’t see Mikes again any way don’t bother coming after me I will just leave again
    Love from Natalie xoxoxo



    Chapter 5

    Back at school

    Lucy’s POV

    “Oh well look who it is EMO dick and EMO dicks girlfriend where is she?” Sian asked in a very interesting tone

    “You mean Natalie, she ran away” I tried inform her
    They only thing I looked forward to during the day was going home, but Gee pulled me away after school had finished

    “I know that the letter told us not to go and find Natalie, but we need to find her, she is only 16 and she can’t live without seeing mikey and along the way we can stay at a hotel for the night and do some stuff” Gerard asked me sweetly

    “Okay then, as we get half way to my Nan’s there is a hotel we can stay the night at” I informed my beloved boyfriend
    After a long drive we finally reached the hotel we booked in and made are way up as we got in Gerard grabbed my wrists, pulled me up right close to him and then kissed me, after a few seconds, I started to unbuckle Gee’s belt, then he took the rest of his clothes off, I took the rest of mine off then we were fully exposed then we turned around so Gee could push me onto the bed as we fell onto the bed Gerard started to talk to me in a strange tone

    “Tell me if I am hurting you”

    Is all Gee told me before he entered me unexpectedly

    The next day we had to go to find Natalie

    A couple of hours later

    Knock, knock
    Natalie: Hello......
    Gerard: why are you saying hello in that voice for
    Natalie: because I told you not to come after me
    Lewis: hey babe who’s at the door
    Lucy: who was that?
     
  13. kadoodle

    kadoodle crazy cat lady Staff Member

    Hi, you'll need to put page numbers in your index so your readers know which page a chapter is on.

    ie: Ch 1 - P 1.

    Start your sentences with a capital letter and run a spell check before you post too. Your ideas are really good, but you need to show them more respect by tidying up the way you present them, if that makes sense. :)
     
  14. adrenaline 2019

    adrenaline 2019 New Member

    Yh it does thanks I will keep that in mind
     
  15. Static scream

    Static scream Member

    an update today??
     
  16. adrenaline 2019

    adrenaline 2019 New Member

    should be today
     
  17. Static scream

    Static scream Member

    oh a-my god drama what will happen next i wanna know more
     
  18. adrenaline 2019

    adrenaline 2019 New Member

    hehehe wait and see
     
  19. kadoodle

    kadoodle crazy cat lady Staff Member

    You're moving this along very quickly, maybe try to build on the moment rather than rushing from one event to the next? Creating some atmosphere and build up when something significant is happening rather than just jumping in will keep your readers hooked. There's a lot of potential here, keep at it!

    You'll also need to update your chapter index within 24 hours.
     
  20. Static scream

    Static scream Member

    ^^
    Natalie can't get to the black parade so she'll make the changes as soon as she can
     

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