SpazishPansy

I woke up to a pair of soft warm lips upon my own. I wasn't sure of who's they belonged too, but it was a sweet nice soft kiss that this person was giving me and soon one of their hands was in my hair kissing me more passionately now then before. We stayed there for a while kissing one another feeling the love this person had for me. But the thing is… who is it? I have no clue I share a tour bus with four other guys and no girls other then some of the guys girlfriends, but their off limits. But out of the four guys I have a love someone I care deeply for and wish with all of my heart that he belonged to me. I wish and hope that one day that that person would see how much I care for them and want to be with them.

The kiss was soon broken and both of us were out of breath I could hear his ragged breath from the hot passionate kiss we both just shared with one another. I stayed where I was not moving and not saying a word, but I still wonder who could this person be? My heart was pounding wanting to know who my secret kisser was and why he kissed me so. My breathing started to slow and start to go back to it's normal pace again, I could feel his hands playing with my hair while the other hand laid on my cheek, of course I moved into the feeling of his hand on my face and prayed it was the love of my life the one I want to spend the rest of my lonely days with. Happy not caring what others would say about it. ``Gerard…'' I heard the voice of and angel, it was him my love, my Frank.

It took me a moment to gather my words from this up coming of him coming to my bed and kissing me awake. Was he not with his soon to be wife? Or is he just wanting to have a quick fuck or someone to make out with while he's away. I swallowed before answering him. ``yes Frank?'' I said afraid of what he's wanting to say to me.

``I love you Gerard more then anything, and I've loved you for some time now.'' Frank said in a quiet loving voice to me, I wanted to choke out with a sob when I head him say that, I've been waiting so long to hear those words come from his mouth. I didn't say anything yet and wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him passionately and in a lovingly way, His reply to that was kissing me back I broke the kiss and smiled up to him even thought the darkness hid the fact that I was smiling madly like a school girl who just got the big macho football player to herself. But he made me happy and I wanted him so badly.

``Frank the truth is I love you too, more then anything. And I've always wanted to tell you but I was afraid that you wouldn't return my feelings'' I said feeling my cheeks heat up with a blush. Oh god! I was so afraid to tell him after all these years! I soon felt Franks lips upon mine once again, I moaned in to the kiss when I felt him grind into my hips with his hard on. Oh god! Was this really happening to me?! Was I really with the one that I love? Frank broke the kiss we were sharing and listened to him speak.

``Gerard… I want you so badly'' He said to me as he started to kiss my neck and waited for my reply. I wanted this! I really did I want nothing more then to make love with Frank my only true love. I nodded yes. And I could tell he noticed it on account he started to take off our clothes. One piece at a time and by the time we were completely naked I was just as hard if not harder then Frank. Frank started to kiss down my chest and his hands rubbed all over my torso. His fingers worked magic all over my skin. And it was amazing. I gasped when I felt Frank's tongue slide over my erected head. I closed my eyes to the feeling of pleasure as it started to slowly take over me. My hands went straight for his black hair and automatically started to play with it. I wanted so badly for him to stop teasing me and to just take me in him already.

``Fra….Frank please stop teasing! It's not nice!'' I moaned out to him as he complied and took me all the way into his mouth. The warm wet feeling engulfing me completely. I was in ecstasy right now, Frank continued to suck and blow, as I called out his name telling him how much I love him and that I'm so glade he feels the same way and that I don't know what I would do with out him in my life, saying that I would just die if I didn't have him. Frank took his mouth off of me as he came back up to my lips and kissed me once more as he positioned himself between my legs. This is what I've been waiting for! For Frank to come to me and fully be with me not just as friends but as lovers! We were going to join together as one finally… ok so I'm a little pleased and sound dorky! But who cares I'm happy!

``Gerard…'' Frank started, I knew where he was going but I interrupted him ``I'm no virgin Please I want you… just take me!'' I said to him in a pleading voice. And as soon as I finished saying it Frank thrusted into him. I cried out in pain, but oh was it pure pleasure! Frank started at a slow pace so I could get use to him then he started to go faster. After a while well… about an hour or so.. I could feel myself about to cum. I opened my mouth to talk. ``Frank… I love you! And I want to be with you for the rest of my life'' I said to him. I could see Frank look up to me with a smile and he opened up his perfect pink supple lips to reply. ``Gerard…I''

``Gerard?'' I felt someone shaking me. I opened my eyes to see a really tire Frank hovering over me. ``Gee? Are you ok? You let out a few cries, and said my name…'' is everything alright with you?'' I looked up to him confused… I was baffled wasn't he just with me in my bed? And we were declaring our love to one another?! I looked to my sheets.

``yeah everything's alright… Just a bad dream…'' lies.. It was a really good dream. Oh I'm such an idiot. Frank doesn't love me. He's getting married to his fiancé Jamia today… that is today isn't it… I looked back up to Frank ``do worry about me I'm fine'' I smiled up to him.

Frank gave me a smiled ``alright well get some sleep… it's going to be a long day tomorrow'' he said to me… it is going to be a long day… a very long day, and it's going to kill me inside. I watched as Frank started to head back to his bed.

``Frank!'' I said quickly. And he stopped and looked at me.

``yeah?'' He said to me

``I love you.'' I said to him wishing he would understand

``I love you too Gerard'' He said with a smile ``you're my best friend'' He added.

I just laid back down and played it in my head ``I love you too Gerard'' not caring that he added you're my best friend to the end of it. He said ti to me and that's all that matters to me right now. I laid here in my bed thinking about the man I love and how he's going to marry someone else, and how my true feelings for him will never be told to him. But I know how I feel and I'm sure deep down in him he feels them to. I can only hope. But he said he loves me, maybe not the way I want him too. But it's a start for now and maybe one day. Will be together, but for now it's only a dream. So I lay here falling asleep alone thinking about my Frankie and how much I love him drifting off once again thinking about him and what he said over and over again till I was asleep and the moment was over, another day of my life over and now I go back to my dreams where Frank and I could be together forever in my mind and heart.

MCR_SAVED_MY_LIFE_

kl fic is there more

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sig pick by SpazishPansy
waycest
we are not a suicide cult we are a army the MCRmy - gerard way
homophobia is gay

SpazishPansy

there's only one more chapter =P it's not a long fic on account i've been writing another...

__________________

The fall of the damned
"Be yourself, Don't take anyone's shit and never let them take you alive." - Gerard Way
Sabs and Pansy: Gee-tards for lifeee

SpazishPansy

chapter 2
P.O.V Gerard

My eyes fluttered open unwillingly. Today was the day. It was the day that the love of my life was going to go off with another. I laid there not caring to get up or the fact that I had to pee really badly. I just stayed where I was looking up to the ceiling of my bunk in which Franks is right above mine. I could feel tears fill my eyes thinking about him and how my dream from the night before teased me so much, I actually thought that Frank was really there with me and we were in fact making love! God how I hate life and all that it has to offer. Nothing has gone right thus far in it? Why live the rest… well there's my family, friends and fans. The three F's in my life and I can't let them down. No I wouldn't let any of them I couldn't bring myself to do that to them, it wouldn't be fair. I sighed and pulled the covers off of me and I got up out of my warm safe bed, my bed where I can go to sleep and dream of what my life would be like if Frank was actually part of it… it's not that he isn't it's just he's not really… oh what am I saying? But I think I'm trying to say that I wish he was actually in a relationship with me and we were the ones starting a new life as one, yeah! that's what I meant!

I looked around and noticed that the others were already up and getting dressed for the wedding today. I went to the bathroom and knocked. No answer. I walked into the bathroom and locked the door behind be and went to the toilet and relieved myself then flushed then moved over to the sink and washed my hands, face, brushed my teeth and combed my hair out. "look at yourself… your pathetic…'' I said to myself with a laugh then left the bathroom to get dressed. When I walked out I bumped into someone. I looked up to see it was Frank.

"Oh Gerard! I'm so sorry I didn't know you were there!'' he said in a rush. I looked him up and down and noticed that he was dressed in his tux already, oh god he looked amazing. So handsome and nice and clean, Frank was always a clean person, he hated germs. There wasn't a wrinkle to be found on him nor stray hairs, nothing was wrong with him. He was perfect.

"it's alright'' I said to him giving him a fake smile and he smiled back at me. His beautiful smile, I loved to see him smile. He was just so good looking when he smiled and it just swelled your heart to see it too. Oh god I'm getting all mushy now… I let him get past me so he could finish what he was going to do then I retreated to the back of the bus where my tux happened to be. And what sucks about this day most? Well Frank asked me to be the best man… fuck… how unfair?! I'm the best man to the man I love more then my life it's self wedding?! But I couldn't say no because he was giving me that smile and I said yes automatically not thinking about what I was saying until he hugged me saying how happy he was to know that I said yes.

I got dressed and made sure my hair was nice and neat and no makeup on my face what so ever. Just plain old me, the normal me not the guy who people see on stage the person who has feelings and cares about others, oh well I'm just going on now. Around one o'clock we were all at the church where Frank and Jamia were going to be united. I was walking through the church and ran into Jamia. "hey Gerard'' she said with a smile I could tell she was nervous right now.
I smiled at her "hey'' I couldn't hate her, never she was such a nice person and if I was to be happy for Frank being with anyone else that wasn't me I'm glade to know it's here, she has such a big heart and cares for others, and she's always been there for all of us when we needed help. But still in the back of my mind and heart I was jealous of her which was slowly turning to hate. I was jealous because she was with Frank and not I… yes I know it sounds childish, but I don't care it's the truth and other people would probably feel the same way if they were in my shoes. I know that for damn sure! And if they weren't then I would have to say what the hell is wrong with you?! "you know you look amazing'' I said to her with a smile on my face trying to feel happy for her. And she smiled back at me.

"thanks Gerard this means a lot to me, I love him so much and I'm really happy this day has finally come, I'm just so nervous! Thinking about this day all the time and I had no clue it was going to be so… well nerve racking!'' she said her voice shaking a little bit.

"hey don't worry about it and you two are really cute together and you two will be really happy'' I said to her trying to calm her nerves a little but I didn't think it would help… hey I tried that's all that counts, Jamia smiled back up to me and gave me a hug and I could here her say thank you. We talked for a few more minutes and I watched her as she went back to her room to finish getting ready for the ceremony, which was going to start in a few minutes. And I well I went back to the room Frank was waiting in. I walked in and noticed how nerve racking he was acting, he was fumbling over his bowtie. I walked up to him and placed a hand on his shoulder. "hey let me help you with that.'' I said to him and he smiled.

`"thanks'' was what he said to me as I started to tie it for him. First I had to take the knot out of it that he created trying to tie the damn thing in the first place. It was very awkward between us. I had to tell him I had to tell Frank how I felt yeah.. I know not the right time but it had to be told.

"Frank?'' I said and his eyes locked onto mine `"I have to tell you something'' I started feeling my heart beat so fast that it felt like it was going to break my rib cage, that's how fast and how hard it was beating. I was so worried that he would laugh and tell me I was being silly and that he almost got him that time. I bit my lower lip to what I had to say but it had to be said I had to get it off my chest and out in the open so he would know, and I didn't have to go on day after day thinking about the day I should of told him how I felt about him but never did. But now is my chance go on Gerard! Tell him here's here alone with you! I opened my mouth again but the words were stuck in my throat.

"Gerard? Are you ok?'' I heard Frank ask as he placed a hand on my shoulder and looking into my eyes to see if anything was wrong with me. I shook my head to his question.

"Frank to tell you the truth no.. I'm not ok'' I said to him right then I blurted it out "Frank I'm in love with you!'' I said to him closing my eyes right now, I felt so.. School girlish closing my eyes waiting for the leader of the football team to answer me with his reply, I stood there waiting for him to answer me, but instead of words I felt hands on my cheeks and lips upon my own. The warm soft feeling of the lips just like the ones I imagined in my dreams. I opened my eyes again when Frank pulled away from the kiss and looked to me.

"oh Gerard…'' Frank started "I love you too… I just never realized how much you actually cared for me and last night when you told me that you loved me, my heart stopped then I brushed it off I just thought you were just saying that.'' he said and I could see him blushing. "I really do love you too'' Frank said looking back to me eyes locked onto mine. I could feel tears in my eyes as he said that to me.

Could this be true? Could my love really be standing here in front of me telling me that he loves me?! No… I can't be. "Oh please don't let this be a dream.'' I begged because if this was another cruel dream of mine I would just die, I really would I couldn't have my heart hurt this much again, it wouldn't be right.

"Gerard.. This isn't a dream I can tell you that much.'' Frank said to me kissing me again to show that it wasn't a dream and the difference between my dream and now is, well I could feel the love Frank has for me in his kiss. That's how I can tell right now that it's not another dream I'm having. I wrapped my arms around Frank holding him closely to me. I took in his smell and the feeling of his body against mine. My life was complete right now, nothing could change this and nothing could take him away from me. Right now all of the problems and everything else in this world was at loss right now. Nothing mattered to me and I doubt anything mattered to Frank. "Gerard… what about my wedding? I'm suppose to go out in a few minutes'' he said to me and my heart sank, that's right I almost forgot that he was marrying Jamia today…

I gave frank a smile "I have an idea'' he said to me and pulled me over to the desk that was there, he sat down and started to write with me holding his left hand as he did so, I was reading over his shoulder and when he was done he smiled and nodded alright. Then we left the room leaving the written piece of paper on the desk.

(Jamia)

"Frank?'' I said knocking on the door but there was no answer from within the room. I opened the door of the room my soon to be husband was suppose to be in. I closed the door behind me and looked around it looked as if he wasn't even in here. "Frankie?'' I called for him and took another look around the room and noticed a folded piece of paper leaning against a vase of roses with my name on it. I walked up to the paper and picked it up and looked around. I opened the note and started to read it.

Dear Jamia,

I wanted to let you know that I love you more then anything in this world, but I don't think were meant to be. I'm sorry to say that I'm not truly in love with you, in fact I'm in love with another. I never wanted to hurt you nor hurt myself, and I truly did love you and I still do. You're an amazing person, but my heart does belong to another, and I know that right now your probably crying and asking why I'm doing this to you. And I hate the fact that I'm doing this to you. But you have to understand, and I'll understand that you don't or never want to see me or talk to me again, but you have to know and I couldn't get married to and end up leaving you later in life. I want you to find someone who will treat you like the queen. A jewel, a star and someone who will never let you go no matter what, and someone who will always be there for you and will give you his heart for the rest of his life, but I'm not that person. And I love all the time we shared together I'll cherish it for the rest of my life, you'll always be in my heart for as long as I live, and that's the truth.

Love always,
Frank.

Tears ran down my cheeks as I finished the letter, I folded it back up and held it to my heart and smiled. I walked over to the window to see Frank and Gerard running out of the church hand in hand. And I realized Frank was never mine, I always knew it wasn't I who he really loved and for some reason I'm glad he choose to go for the one he loves, I could never hate Frank nor Gerard for taking him on my wedding day. I was happy for him and I knew from the way he always talked about Gerard and looked at him he was in love. I smiled again with the tears running down my face not from sadness but from happiness, that's just been swelling up right now. "I love you two Frank'' I said to myself holding the letter and watching them go off down the road hand in hand.

(Gerard)

I was so filled with happiness right now. As we ran out of the church I could see from the window of the room in which Frank and I had just left was Jamia watching us leave with one another and she was smiling, I'm guessing she was happy for us, and I surely hoped she understood. "Gerard?'' I hear Frank say and I looked in his direction and smiled.

"yeah?'' I said never happier. Frank smiled up to me.

"I love you so much.'' was all he said as we got to my car and I opened the passengers side and opened it up, letting him and closing the door behind him after he got in, and I climbed in on the drivers side and started the car and pulled away from this place onto a new road with a new life and a new day ahead of us. "where are we going?'' Frank asked me and I just smiled and replied.

"where ever, it doesn't matter to me for all I care I could drive till the ends of time as long as I'm with you in the end.'' I said to him and continued to drive and thought about a letter I had to write to my family and a sorry note to Jamia having to tell all of our families what happened, but all of that can wait for now, as long as I have Frank by my side nothing can bother me.

__________________

The fall of the damned
"Be yourself, Don't take anyone's shit and never let them take you alive." - Gerard Way
Sabs and Pansy: Gee-tards for lifeee

MCR_SAVED_MY_LIFE_

that is possibly the most romantic thing eva i actually cried well done

__________________
stupid:

sig pick by SpazishPansy
waycest
we are not a suicide cult we are a army the MCRmy - gerard way
homophobia is gay

SpazishPansy

awww thanks ^^ you just made me really happy inside. your the first one to really like it. I was thinking of writing up more to go with it but I'm not really sure, i wanna do that I think it might ruen this one.
but i'm really glade you like it ^^
-smiles happily-

__________________

The fall of the damned
"Be yourself, Don't take anyone's shit and never let them take you alive." - Gerard Way
Sabs and Pansy: Gee-tards for lifeee

MCR_SAVED_MY_LIFE_

i think u should deffo write more plz *begz*

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stupid:

sig pick by SpazishPansy
waycest
we are not a suicide cult we are a army the MCRmy - gerard way
homophobia is gay

xMother War

MORE.
DYING.
FOR MORE.

GAHHHH.

Frank's letter made me cry!!

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SpazishPansy

ok ok!
I'll write more just for you too!
but I need to think of something good to write I'll try to have it up for you today or tomorrow. promise ^^

__________________

The fall of the damned
"Be yourself, Don't take anyone's shit and never let them take you alive." - Gerard Way
Sabs and Pansy: Gee-tards for lifeee

MCR_SAVED_MY_LIFE_

OMG YAY u r so amazing take ya time writing it aslong as there is more ill wait as its so damm romantic

__________________
stupid:

sig pick by SpazishPansy
waycest
we are not a suicide cult we are a army the MCRmy - gerard way
homophobia is gay