HollowPistol

RATING: 16+ (ALL) (violence, sex, language.)

DISCLAIMER:I have no contact with MCR and all this that I write is totally fiction.

Note:: I love writing one-shots when I get some small Idea's.
Especially when I have a writers block or something :/

CHAPTER INDEX::
What is Love? (one-shot) PG-1
The one thing that stays mine PG-1

What is Love?

If there was ever a time to feel loved, the moment was lost, if there was ever a time to feel wanted, the moment was gone.

I was empty and with it my dreams were crushed as I sat down on the door step licking my dried lips and thinking back to the old days, the days where I was always gone in some kinda dead dream. I was drunk, I partied, but now I wanted to loose it all.
I wanted to loose everything that I was obsessed over, especially the one who made me obsessed over it all.
Him.
That one, that one addiction above all else, that one who taught me lesson after lesson.
if you leave, you’ll always be alone, you’ll always want to come back, come back to your addiction Gerard. his voice echoed, I shook my head, I would never go back.
“You mean nothing Bert.” I said out loud.
The nighttime air felt good against my skin, my face, I just sat outside of my house, I couldn’t go in just yet. Those looks…those glares…I wasn’t ready to face them, not at all. I couldn’t face it all.

“I’m tired of your shit Gerard!” Mikey spat at me, his eyes filling with tears, I just stared at him in my dizzy moment, too many pills and booze filling my head. “Your pathetic! When the hell will you wake up? Do you even think about your little brother, mom? Frank?! Your BEST FUCKING FRIEND?” He screamed, I smiled dully at him, didn’t respond but I nodded.
“I love you all…” I said with out slurring, Mikey shook his head.
“No, no you don’t! If you did, you would quit! QUIT!” he screamed and then slammed my door, I let myself sink further into my chair and then brought the vodka bottle to my numb lips. “Why don’t you quit nagging…” I whispered taking another drink.

Memories, all they do is flood your head, fill you up with guilt. How much guilt could a guy take?
Me? I could take the weight of the world it appeared, but no, I knew that my time of taking things were gone…now I was collapsing.
I had let down Mikey, Frank, my mom…I had let them all down.
Why would they take me back now?

“What happened to us?” Frank asked, I looked over and shook my head, then looked back down at the pills I was about to take in. “What happened to you Gee? You use to draw, sing, smile…and now…now I cant even get you to grip reality. Bert doesn’t care about you…”
“Yes he fucking does!” I yelled looking at a startled Frank. He nervously bit down on his lip and took his lip ring in his mouth chewing on it nervously. This was the first time I had yelled at him, I think it was cause of the booze.
“Not like I do Gee…” I heard him whisper as he left the bathroom shutting the door behind him, I looked at myself in the mirror and then shoved the pills in my mouth.

I had been so blind, blind to not notice how much Frank was really there for me, he liked me…he was in love with me.
Did love exist? I learned it in a different way, it was tough love from Bert, that way was the only love that I knew. Frank had loved me, and I broke it all.
Why would he take me back now?
I heard the door behind me squeak open, I shot up and turned around already waiting for some yelling to start, but then I felt a shove and an embrace against me. Hard and fast and there Frank was hugging me tightly and not letting me go, I didn’t know what to say.
I reacted by hugging him back and watching as Mikey looked out the door, his face hard to read.

“He’s been worried about you.” Mikey said, as if it explained why Frank forgave me for anything that I had did. “Not that you would care, your probably fucked up…”
“I don’t care if he’s fucked up!” Frank was now sobbing into my neck and my heart beat increased, I couldn’t take this, they thought I was all medicated.
“I’m no fucking up, I’m sober. Hear me? SOBER!” I said looking at Mikey, he didn’t seem to believe me at all. Frank looked at me, his eyes all teary, I could swear at that moment I wanted to kiss him. “I am sober Mike’s.” I said calmly while I was still holding Frank, Mikey nodded and looked sad for a moment. “Can…I come in?” I had no clue if I was still able to come in my own house, I had been gone for about a month…I didn’t know if they disowned me or not.
“Yes…” Mikey said, Frank never left my side while we went inside the house.

“H-how’s mom?” I asked as we had sat on the couch, only mere moment before I was outside feeling bad for myself, and now I was in here…and it just felt all too weird.
“She still loves you Gee, she always loved you…its just…you gave us all stress…” Mikey said.
“Look, I know I hurt you, all of you…and I’m sorry. I came to the realization that I didn’t need Bert, I needed to quit it all and get my act together…and I swear that’s what I’ll do…I’ll do whatever it takes…I just want my normal life back…” I felt Frank hugging me tighter. “I’m sorry Frankie, I really really am sorry.” I whispered to him.
“Its ok…Gee…I…” he stopped and looked up at Mikey, who nodded and then left to the back. I began to get confused at this and looked back at Frank looking into his pain filled eyes.

“I love you…But not as much as I fucking love these pills.” Bert sang next to me, I was too high but I was wrapped in his words, I pressed myself on his lap and looked at him, he stared at me now with a small smile that was playing on his lips.
“You love me Bert?” I asked, he nodded.
“Fucking love you way!” He sang again, and then I believed him at that moment, his hands found there was on my waist and his lips were brought to mine and we kissed, but his kiss was more hungry and not filled with the kind of love I was feeling. But I didn’t need that kind of love, who did when the pills and booze could make you feel it alone if you wanted to?

Many a night Bert would say that, and many a night I would fall for it, always the sex and drugs that kept me high. But that wasn’t love, it wasn’t love that I had experienced…it was addiction.
Now staring at Frank, I knew that I had a different love for him, not the addiction that I had always lived in.
No this was love.
“I love you Frank.” I said, Frank looked at me bewildered pulling away from his tight embrace. “I’m so sorry…but I’ve always loved you and forever I will.” I whispered, still having the need to say it all in one quick motion.
“I’ve always loved you.” Frank said back, I smiled at him and then he tackled me again on the couch, he was pressing his lips to mine and I pressed back letting my hand graze through his soft hair while he lay on time of me not parting our kiss.
It was passionate, it wasn’t lust full, it was something that I hadn’t felt, nothing I could describe.
This was my new addiction, this was love, and I knew that I didn’t want it to stop.




Oweee, this is going to be my first one shot album!
YAY!
I have two other one shots out there...too bad I didnt think of starting one so that they could be together, but now I have one so they wont be so scattered.
I know this one is kinda short...but...
Tell me what ya think ;D

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famousXdeadX

that was just too cute!
damn bert! and pills! and booze!!
dammit, I reallly fucking hate bert so much [in every story, hah]
amazing one-shot!

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The VAMPIRE(and his)Pint sized ROMEO.


Miracles happen all the time,
so where is yours?

HollowPistol

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famousXdeadX

^I hate him in real life too. xD

__________________
The VAMPIRE(and his)Pint sized ROMEO.


Miracles happen all the time,
so where is yours?

Seraphim

^ Haha same here...

I really liked that story though! ^_^

<33

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Cali is my sex-muffin!! | Reverend Strychnine Twitch is my bitch | Married to: Aly, Ayesha, Becca, Shannen, Sinead & Stefi

Evenstar

Aww that was cute =]

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HollowPistol

Music inspiration::Jimmy eat world-23 MUST LISTEN TO IT WHILE READING THIS.
Pairing:: Frank/Gerard


Gerard felt the wind on his pale face, his hair moving delicately and his hands cupping a cup of coffee while he looked out into the sunset on the dock.
This was indeed a romantic view, but romance was never Gerard’s number one thing.
He was always alone, always thought he would be alone.
what are you hoping for? His thoughts came in, and Gerard knew that there wasn’t hope, he wasn’t hoping for anything…Frank wasn’t going to come back on that ship, Frank had somehow lost his fight.
Things were better left the way they were, the departure was hard for sure…but Gerard knew that that was going to be the last time he would smile at him, the last time his eyes showed him how much he cared.
And the last time he felt his lips on his.
…no one else will know these lonely dreams, no one else will know…that part of me…but you…Frank… Gerard’s mind filled his head with words again, his eyes beginning fill with tears.
Just one more touch, just one more kiss, just one more smile…
But no.
no one else will have me, only you…
He gripped his coffee tighter and shut his eyes, that were blinded behind shades, tears slowly fell down his cheeks, the water took on a scene of pure romance.
“Why am I here? He’s not…the ships not going to come back…” Gerard sobbed out and couldn’t take it anymore. He fell to his knees dropping his coffee and began to sob out. “Frank please come back!” He shouted.
The world could be so cruel, sending out men to do there duty’s and leaving those at home feeling alone, petrified. Lost in there own mind.
Gerard felt that way, he knew well enough how the world could be, how people could be, he knew that it was all over…everything was going to be over.
The ship wouldn’t come in, and Frank would be laying away somewhere, cold.
“What’s wrong?” A shadow form came over Gerard’s looking down at his shaking body, spilt coffee leaking out in front of him and he didn’t care.
He couldn’t talk, he didn’t want to talk, he wanted the stranger to go away…to never talk to him again. Or maybe better, just shoot him in the head and get it all over with. He shook and gasped for air. “Gerard?” He still didn’t look up, but he stopped sobbing and realized that he knew that voice, he would never forget that voice, it was an angel and his angel alone.
“Are you…is it really?” Gerard asked, mostly himself, but now looking up the setting sun glowed on his skin, the beautiful man in front of him.
The one he thought that he had lost completely.
Frank’s hair was cut short, he had some dirt on him and still wearing his green suit holding the helmet in his hands, he was grinning now down at the half broken Gerard.
“Yeah…its me…” Gerard jumped up and then embraced Frank tightly, the wind blowing more slower now and Gerard sobbing into his lovers chest.
“I thought you were gone…I thought…I thought they…” he sobbed and Frank dropped his helmet and embraced Gerard burying his head in the crook of his neck.
“I’m here…here to stay…I missed you Gee…” He whispered.
“I missed you…so much…so so much…Frank…” Frank pulled Gerard’s weak face up and for the first time in such a long time, they kissed, most passionately and tenderly, Gerard’s hand innocently touching Frank’s cheek lightly and shutting his eyes.
The scene here was one of a romance Gerard would never thought that he would have, the scene here was one of a romance that Frank thought he was never going to experience again.
They smiled at each other, Gerard’s hand clasped Frank’s and they began to walk down the docks, the sun that was setting now looking more brighter and beautiful.
“I love you Gerard.” Frank said turning his head to look at him, Gerard looked back and without any hesitation replied.
I’m here, I’m now, I’m ready…holding on tight, don’t give away the end, the one thing that stays mine.

“I love you too.”

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REASONx346

Arghhh >.<. First Demolition Lovers and now this!
I'm crying my fucking eyes out right now.
I love this so fucking much<3333
I love you so fucking much!!<333
Thankyou<3333

ily<33

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One of the few reasons I'm still breathing.
One of the few reasons I'm able to handle things on my own.
One of the few reasons I enjoy living.
One simply complex reason that I owe my entire life to.